Probably the strangest ever request.

westie4566

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Just putting this out there as I'm racking my brain. And those of a delicate personality look away now as this is going to be brutally blunt.

My Dad is in his last few weeks of life. End stage cancer and in hospital and nae ever leaving under his own steam. We (me and him) are 'OK' with this, we've had a long time to get used to the idea, discussed at length and I have all his wishes in place.

Now to the request. It's the auld yin's 87th Birthday on Saturday. All the usual stuff organised wi a nice cake etc., and family and friends all arranged to turn up on Saturday afternoon.

My dilemma is...what the hell to get him as a present?? He doesn't actually need anything, nor ever has. It's always been very good malts as he does like a decent dram.....but that's out of the picture unless I smuggle on a hip flask!! That said I don't want to be responsible for finishing him off, so to speak!

Not looking for sympathy, just some good ideas. My brain is frazzled on this one.
 

Chicharito

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Difficult one Westie! My sympathies are with you. Buy him a nice bottle of malt. You will probably end up drinking it, but surely a small tot would be OK. I think the fact that you have arranged a bit of a get together and cake etc...
is sufficient. You being there for him in the last few weeks will be a great comfort to him, I am sure. All the best,
Chicharito.
 

SOS

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Sorry did not mean to press the thanks button trying to get used to a new touchscreen computer. Just give him as much of your time that you can which will be far more important to him than any present ,I am sure if you want to give him a dram no one would object.
 

mows

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Nothing made my mum happier at that time, than spending time going through old photos with family.

You might think your prepared and its for the best.

But it will still be a massive blow to you Andy when the day comes.

All the best

Alan
 

Heero

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How about a couple strippers and a few lines of blow?

Good luck, Andy.
 

longchuck

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Take him in a dram Andy,I'm sure he would love that,also having the family round about him willperk him up a bit,it will also leave yous all some nice memories,been through it with my own father,thoughts are with yous and hope yous have a nice day with the old man
 

orchy1999

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My Sympathy's Westie your old man sounds a diamond.

I'm with Heero on this except it would be a couple of blue pills, 2 filipino dancing girls and a bottle of 50 Year old macallan and wish to be left alone with the above on the Saturday night.
 

Rrrr

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Is there no way you can smuggle him out for a bit and take him somewhere he would enjoy ? Even if its out for a dram.
If not maybe take some old photos etc in and share some memories with him and give him a big hug.

Sent from my SM-G965F using Tapatalk
 

Perrypokemon

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There is absolutely nothing strange in your request. It seems to me to be a perfectly normal one. In the position that you find yourself in, I and I am sure the rest of us would be faced with the same dilemma. if you have family round there on Saturday then if he is strong enough how about taking him out for a few hours on Sunday? Anywhere just for a bit of change of scenery, atmosphere and some fresh air. Hospitals can be really oppressive places. I lost both parents at different times of my life and completely agree with Alan Mows, it is a massive blow when it comes. I am sure though that you will find strength that you didn't know you had. Take care of yourself.
 

Big Ben

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My good lady gave me a photo album on my birthday of all “best bit” over the years. It’s absolutely brilliant!

Very simple to arrange as well. You simply upload all the photos you want included, pay the money and it arrives through the post completely done.

I will message her now and get the details of the site.
 

MCXFisher

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Westie,

my thoughts are with you.

When my late step father was dying he was being hydrated via tube but felt desperately thirsty. What he craved was a gin and tonic. I spoke to the specialist who said that even if it drowned him it was a far kinder way to go than life support. Accordingly, I brought in the gin and tonic. It didn't kill him, but he died much happier the next afternoon having enjoyed a couple of stiff gins.

Talk to the specialist and bring in the Glenfarclas 15. You'll both feel better for it.
 

Big Ben

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My good lady gave me a photo album on my birthday of all “best bit” over the years. It’s absolutely brilliant!

Very simple to arrange as well. You simply upload all the photos you want included, pay the money and it arrives through the post completely done.

I will message her now and get the details of the site.
This is the site. It arrives in a leather bound hard back and looks incredible.


Photo Books | Create A Personalised Photo Album | ASDA photo

Cheers
 
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westie4566

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Thanks everyone for the suggestions.

Personally, I love the idea of a couple of hookers and some (non prescription) drugs, however I can just see the headline now. 'Drugs Fuelled Sex Party at NHS Hospital'. :lol: Perhaps not..... (I'll tell the auld yin that one though, that'll make him laugh)

Sadly getting him out for the day isn't an option either as he's no longer mobile.

Already have loads of his favourite old photos on his tablet which he does enjoy, however thanks for your idea Big Ben/Alan

So, a decent dram it is
 
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Feugh

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I know that you didn't want sympathy, Westie, but you have mine anyway. I hope that you both manage to enjoy his birthday.
All the best to you both,
Doug.
 

Oscar

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Westie, please accept my sympathies (at least a little bit!).

My dear old mum died about 5 years ago, and I spent the last weekend with her, by her bedside, just talking to her. I don't think she was really there (the cancer had got her by then), but I often think back to what she would have wanted at that point in time, had she been able to ask.

Apart from having my brother there as well (rather than just me) I really just think to have her child and husband by her side was the extent of her wants.

So, I would agree with others that a nip of a nice dram, a good chat about the good days, with as many family as possible, will leave him pretty happy.

Good luck with the weekend - as others have said it will be bloody hard.

Oscar.
 

wormo

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my dad, although not about to pass away had an accident near 3 years ago and suffered brain damage rendering him to a home, its heart breaking and I can feel your pain, I would suggest you make a scrap book with photos and bits and pieces of his past life , my dad likes nothing more than to go through old photos or read bits and pieces from his old town and football team "the bairns"
we sit and read through old books of falkirk and stirling and he loves photos of my fishing as it was a big part of our life together and also he cherishes photos and stories of my sons football team
 

Safranfoer

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Oh Andy... .Definitely the dram. And the fact you're all there, spending time together, is all the gift anyone needs. My heart is with you.

Other ideas though...

Are there any films you could watch together, assuming he has the attention span? The TV shows you watched together as a family, holiday videos, his favourite football team... I dunno - something that brings the outside in, though, and gets him out, mentally.

You could get him a digital photo frame, so the pics he has on his tablet are rotating in eyeline all the time?

How about naming a star for him?

Maybe a bit last minute, but there's still time... This company lets you create a podcast made up of answerphone messages left specifically for the occasion - so all his friends and ex-colleagues, the people that can't be there for the get together, call a freephone number and wish him a happy birthday, and it's available as a download to listen to. Might be a nice touch - you get to record a message for everyone ringing in to hear before they record, so you can guide them and them to keep it relatively upbeat, happy birthday, thinking of you, with a bit of information about what they're up to (as opposed to, sorry you're dying dude - bit of a conversation killer...): LifeOnRecord – They're Special, Tell them Why.

Take care, my love x
 

westie4566

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Oh Andy... .Definitely the dram. And the fact you're all there, spending time together, is all the gift anyone needs. My heart is with you.

Other ideas though...

Are there any films you could watch together, assuming he has the attention span? The TV shows you watched together as a family, holiday videos, his favourite football team... I dunno - something that brings the outside in, though, and gets him out, mentally.

You could get him a digital photo frame, so the pics he has on his tablet are rotating in eyeline all the time?

How about naming a star for him?

Maybe a bit last minute, but there's still time... This company lets you create a podcast made up of answerphone messages left specifically for the occasion - so all his friends and ex-colleagues, the people that can't be there for the get together, call a freephone number and wish him a happy birthday, and it's available as a download to listen to. Might be a nice touch - you get to record a message for everyone ringing in to hear before they record, so you can guide them and them to keep it relatively upbeat, happy birthday, thinking of you, with a bit of information about what they're up to (as opposed to, sorry you're dying dude - bit of a conversation killer...): LifeOnRecord – They're Special, Tell them Why.

Take care, my love x
Cheers Dee. Some good ideas there! x
 

Lamson v10

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Probably just having yous around will be enough but take the man a dram and enjoy the day with him and your family andy, happy memories and sad times, my heart goes out to yous andy
 

Gauldalen

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Andy...
I hope Dee will not be offended when she sees that I just copied and pasted the first sentence of her input.
«Definitely the dram. And the fact you're all there, spending time together, is all the gift anyone needs. My heart is with you.»
I could not have said it better! I was working in the Far East, when the same situation occurred for my father and I came home too late! Just enjoy the time you both can have together! :thumb:
 

barbonboy

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Westie, I hope you and your family have the best day possible, under the circumstances.:thumb:
 
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martymo

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Hi Westie, Im sure everyones thoughts are with you at this difficult time. Here are a couple of suggestions.

Make a donation on his behalf

Gift him small piece of yellow jasper to keep on his person. It is believed to have some qualities that may be useful/appropriate whist there are others that may not apply. When you are not with him you will be there in spirit.

Thinking of you all, MM

Yellow Jasper Meaning and Uses | Crystal Vaults
 
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Hemmy

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Being an orphan in my late sixties you won’t be surprised to know that I’ve experienced similar dilemmas.....every individual situation is different and uniquely personal to those concerned.For what it’s worth I would suggest that you do not make any plans other than to assemble his loved ones together and everyone have a dramor two to celebrate your dad’s life.
Thinking about you at this difficult time......thinking about you pal.
 
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